Blogging

I've been blogging now, since a couple of weeks and I'm still not sure what to think about it. Maybe it's a lack of confidence, but I can seriously not imagine, who would like to read and/or follow my block.
I just don't feel like I have something (not talking about 750 words a week) interesting and with a good quality to say. I wouldn't say that I think blogs are a bad idea, in general I even think that they can be good and useful. Can be. If important people or at least people talk/blog about a topic they are really familiar with, a topic they are so interested in that they have interesting stuff to say every week, than I do like blogs.

I'm not sure if I'm completely right, since I didn't read all or just most of the blogs in this class, so it could be that i'm completely wrong now, but i feel like most of the kids here are not confident enough about one or three topics. And I don't want to be rude, but I seriously doubt that anyone (okay maybe a few creepy guys) are interested blogs about tattoos or Hawkeyes or Twilight. There are just much better blogs than the ones we do. If you but a lot of effort into it, I'm sure that everyone in this class could produce a good blog, but most of the kids (included me) don't feel the urge to do that.

I will definitely keep blogging, but I would mainly say, because I have to. But: I'm still not sure what I should think about so many personal information on the internet (honestly, if you write a blog, you just put more and more personal stuff on there).

If you feel that I'm completely wrong about my opinion about blogs, just tell me, I would love to hear your opinion!

Forgetting a language

Yesterday was my grandpa's birthday. Okay, that is not so world important that I would need to tell everyone, but just wait.
Of course did I call him (like every good granddaughter) to say happy birthday. He was so happy to talk to me for a second and after I told him at least 4 times that I'm fine and not starving he spoke a little bit in a very strong German accent and asked me if I could still understand him.
And yes of course I could. How could you forget a language after just a few months?! But my grandfather seemed to be really worried that I would have problems to communicate with him and spoke just "clear" (as accent less as he could) German.

Can you forget your native language that fast?! I would definitely say no and I even think that you could never forget your mother tongue. Wouldn't it be sad if you forget how you spoke in your childhood or that you couldn't communicate anymore with the people (your family) you spend the first couple of years in your lifetime?

I once met a man, he was about 86, but in a pretty good shape, who immigrated in the US when he was about 16. As soon as he arrived here he stopped speaking German and never picked it up again. So I was talking to him in German and he could seriously not understand me. It made me kind of sad, I couldn't believe it.
Well he didn't seem to care, but I swore myself that I will never forget to speak German.

I probably couldn't anyway since I'll go back in a few months :'(.

February?!

It's already February and I really can't believe it. Maybe I like winter so much, because I have to leave in the end of spring. It's still about 4 more months, but I feel like it's nothing and everything about late spring (for example prom) makes me freak out and I really try not to think about it.
I fell sorry for my family, because they think that I don't want to go home, which is just partly true. I just feel like my year here just started and I wasted the first half of it. I wish I could just turn the time back and start all over again.

When I was in Germany (back in the day) I went to a couple of preparation meetings from my organization and they tried to give you all the advises for a successful year abroad. Anyway, they talked a lot of nonsense but a few things they said are really true.

They told me for example that a lot of kids really get homesick after Homecoming (kind of true) and especially bad in January. That was absolutely not true for me. Last month felt like the best one so far.

But they also told me, that a lot of kids panic in the end, because they absolutely don't want to go home, which hurts their natural parents a lot (they even said, that I should better not tell them). But that mainly just starts about 3 weeks before the departure.

I don't want to spend my last months here, worrying how to stop the time. I just try to enjoy it as much as possible, but still ... there is this mean little thought in the back of my mind, that I'll have to leave too soon.